Friday, October 31, 2008

To the Ugly Lady in Fakta.

Dear Ugly Lady at Fakta who told me not to yell at my son,
(and by the way that was NOWHERE NEAR a yell)

If there are children unfortunate enough to have you as a mother I hope they throw a huge tempertantrum the next time you are in a store. Then I hope they have grandchildren that throw huge tempertantrums every time they see you. I hope they scream and flop on the floor. I hope they slobber and yell. I hope they kick and flail about. Then I hope someone as all knowing as YOU shows up and give you their ever-so-insightful opinion on the matter.

I forgive you. I'm sure you are just bitter at being stuck in Denmark indefinitely. Enjoy your grocery shopping and guess what - In America bread is only 97 cents, shopping bags are free, and these things called "chocolate chips" exist but you'll never get them - so HA.

And to the man who threw a little fit in the Fakta parking lot because I went out the wrong way: GET OVER IT!!! Yes, sicking my tongue out at you may have been immature but the look on your face made me slightly happier. And for you guess what...? In America, gas is $3.50 a gallon and you could buy three nice cars for the same price as your one ugly, rusty one.

I never even shop at Fakta (grocery store). I just wanted one little thing which I didn't even find. Needless to say I won't be returning to Fakta. I hope Fakta burns to the ground in the middle of the night.

I wonder if I have free speech here? I'm going to lay down...


Ninster said...

Hey Tara! Sounds like you didn't have a good day in Denmark! I didn't know you had that in you! I told you y'all need to come back to the great US of A! I agree with you...people need to mind their own business when it comes to our kids because they don't walk in our shoes! And yes, ol' geezerds are rude and self-centered! Way to go, my friend! If you need me to go over there and kick some butt, I'll be happy to fly over there...only if you spring for the airfare! LOL!!!!

Julie said...

Go Tara, go Tara! :)

Anonymous said...

Hi Tara,

I found your blog through the expat. blog link page, and I've been reading a bit, VERY funny reading especially this post!

We have often been verbally abused by people in the street (total strangers) telling us off for things like:

-not dressing our kids the Danish way (snowsuits by first leaf fall)
-raising my voice in direction of kids (one particular time sticks in my memory, one of my sons had made a mad dash into the road so I screeched something slightly insulting at him relating to a possible lack of his wits ( spur of the moment and I do regret my wording) and dragged him out of the path of a thundering truck, an old lady at bus stop said that 'we don't treat kids like that in Denmark'. Oops. I suppose I should have watched him get squished.)

Lots of times I have been told off really grumpily for not knowing what is what here. I don't think the natives mean it, but it must be shocking to see people flagrantly breaking rules established to create order, so they let us have it.

Sometimes I wonder if I should start an 'Oh crikey! I thought Denmark would be easy!..' blog about DK but I would be frightened of retribution after a few posts!!

We come from an Anglo-American background and have relatively young kids (eldest 12) and live near Århus (so near I go shopping there). May I ask if you know if there are any meet ups for expats in the area?

I am so so missing understandable conversation, or rather, the Danes are lovely, really lovely, I love them and all that, but of course, it's also hard to get through those barriers.

Right, sorry, I have rambled on!


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